The problem with punishments
Punishments don't teach anything positive.
Carlotta Cerri
–
Fondatrice de La Tela
7 giugno 2022·8 commenti
The problem with punishments, briefly, is that they don't teach anything positive. They don't promote ethical growth, responsibility, altruism, or empathy.
Punishments promote:
Punishments promote:
- Resentment;
- Stress, both for those who receive it and for those who inflict it;
- Finding tricks to avoid being discovered;
- The use of force with friends, because they teach children that that's how you get what you want;
- The urge to lie;
- Egocentrism, thinking almost exclusively of their own interests.
And above all, punishments don't help develop a familiarity with mistakes which in life will always be a lifesaver: mistakes teach that it's okay to get it wrong, to fall and get back up.
Instead of punishing and condemning mistakes, stay by your child's side, ask questions to understand, give them benefit of the doubt, reflect together on how they could have done better or differently.
Shortcuts in parenting don't get us where we want to go. If you want your children to become adults who know balance, empathy, and resilience, punishing for mistakes is not the way to go.
Instead of punishing and condemning mistakes, stay by your child's side, ask questions to understand, give them benefit of the doubt, reflect together on how they could have done better or differently.
Shortcuts in parenting don't get us where we want to go. If you want your children to become adults who know balance, empathy, and resilience, punishing for mistakes is not the way to go.
Scritto da
Carlotta Cerri
– Fondatrice de La Tela
Sono la fondatrice de La Tela, creatrice del podcast Educare con calma e dal 2019 viaggio a tempo pieno con la mia famiglia Alex, Oliver ed Emily. Mi ritengo una visionaria pessimista: so come voglio cambiare l’educazione e che genitore ho scelto di essere, ma la maggior parte dei giorni mi sembra di scalare pareti di vetro. Ma forse proprio per questo so come aiutarti quando mi scrivi: perché ci passo anche io per quel disagio e ti dico le verità scomode con gentilezza e senza giudizio.
